I'm feeling particularly wicked today. For those sarcastic moments when you need just the right insult ...
- Do you want some cheese with that whine?
- I started out with nothing & still have most of it left.
- I pretend to work. They pretend to pay me. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.
- Does your train of thought have a caboose?
- Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.
- A PBS mind in an MTV world.
- Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.
- Suburbia: where they tear out the trees & then name streets after them.
- South Africa: where the pizza arrives before the police.
- Well, this day was a total waste of makeup and heels.
- Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.
- I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
- An office is just a padded cell without a door.
- Stress is when you wake up screaming & you realise you haven't fallen asleep yet.
- Can I swap this job for what's behind door number 1?
- I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.
- Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
- Murphy's Law prohibits me from admitting I'm wrong.
- Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?
- Chaos, panic and disorder -- my work here is done.
- I plead contemporary insanity.
- How do I set a laser printer to stun?
- Meandering to a different drummer.
