Thursday Ponderings

• Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong. 
• I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger. 
• There is great need for a sarcasm font. 
• How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet? 
• Was learning cursive really necessary? 
• Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood. 
• Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died. 
• I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired. 
• Bad decisions make good stories. 
• You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day. 
• I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to. 
• "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this ever. 
• I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Damnit!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voice mail. What did you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away? 
• I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste. 
• I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call. 
• I think the freezer deserves a light as well. Ever heard of midnight ice-cream cravings?
• Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I first saw it. 
• I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in. 
• I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger. 
• How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said? 
• I love the sense of comaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent an asshole from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters! 
• Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever. 
• Is it just me or do high school kids get dumber and dumber every year? 
• There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.. 
• As a driver I hate pedestrians and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.50 points a pop!
• Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is. 
• Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet my arse everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time!

more